Starting at Zero

The Context

It’s 2025, and a lot has been going on. Some challenges we face aren’t new — inflation, rising housing and healthcare costs, childcare — but they’re real and growing. The one I want to focus on is joblessness: what happens when it hits, and the process that unfolds afterward.

This experience isn’t unique. Many are facing it in different ways, but beneath every story are stages, struggles, and lessons that — when understood — can reveal surprising potential for growth.

Losing the Job, Finding Yourself

I lost my job during a period of imbalance — the kind that builds slowly when you’re pushing hard for too long. Even though I sensed it could happen, there’s no real way to prepare for it when it does.

Over time, I realized the deeper loss wasn’t just professional — it was personal. Somewhere along the way, I had stopped recognizing parts of myself. That disconnection made me unhappy in ways I didn’t fully see until everything stopped.

Through reflection and healing, I began to reconnect with who I’d become. I found clarity, drive, and a renewed sense of purpose. I came out stronger — more aligned, more balanced, and more confident in what’s next.

Making Sense of the Process

The journey through joblessness can be complicated — sometimes dark, sometimes slow, or maybe brief. But it doesn’t have to define you. Giving it context helps. Breaking it down makes it human.

To make sense of it, I turned to a psychological concept called the Kübler-Ross Model — the five stages of grief. Though typically associated with loss, it offers a powerful lens for understanding the emotional shifts that come with losing a job.

The Five Stages of Job Loss

1. Denial — “This Isn’t Happening”

Even when you see it coming, part of you refuses to believe it’s real. The email, the meeting, the goodbye — they happen, yet don’t fully register. That’s denial at work: the mind’s way of protecting identity.

In my case, things had started to feel misaligned long before the end came. Yet when it finally happened, it didn’t feel real. I kept mentally showing up to a place that no longer existed.

Denial, though, can be a quiet space for reflection. Who am I outside of that environment? What parts of myself did I lose along the way? When you start asking those questions, “This isn’t happening” begins to shift toward “Maybe this needed to happen.”

2. Anger — “Why Me?”

Anger shows up next — loud, justified, human. It’s the frustration of losing control, the unfairness of it all. I felt that too.

But I learned that holding onto anger keeps you tethered to what’s gone. Redirecting it, though — that’s where change begins. I turned the frustration into focus, using it as fuel to rebuild, sharpen my goals, and move toward work that aligned with who I wanted to become.

Anger, when transformed, becomes motion. It’s the spark that ignites reinvention.

3. Bargaining — “If Only…”

This stage hides behind logic. You replay the past, edit scenarios in your mind: If only I’d done this. If only I’d stayed quiet. If only I’d said more. But that loop doesn’t lead anywhere.

So I made a different bargain — not with the past, but with myself. I decided to channel that energy into self-improvement and quiet growth. I kept it off social media, choosing to build privately rather than perform recovery publicly. That decision created space for clarity and confidence to return.

The healthier bargain isn’t if only — it’s what now.

4. Depression — “What Now?”

Eventually, everything slows down. The noise fades, and the stillness sets in. It’s uncomfortable — no routine, no structure, no certainty. But this is also where transformation begins.

For me, this stage became about rebuilding from the inside out: new routines, deeper reflection, rediscovering creativity, and defining what fulfillment actually means. It was less about loss and more about recalibration.

"Depression isn’t a void; it’s a signal — a pause that asks who you want to become before you move again."

5. Acceptance — “Beginning Right”

Acceptance doesn’t mean forgetting or pretending it didn’t hurt. It means understanding — seeing how the loss cleared space for what’s real.

For me, that realization came gradually. The job loss didn’t break me; it freed me. It stripped away everything misaligned and made room for renewed drive, discipline, and purpose. It helped me see work as an extension of who I am, not a replacement for it.

"Starting at zero isn’t about beginning again — it’s about beginning right."

My New Foundation: Intentional Growth

The greatest insights I've gained from this event revolve around intentionality and self-devotion. For me, "Starting at Zero" means re-investing in myself and deliberately choosing my actions, all while embodying the principle of leading by example and delivering on my goals.

My devotion is now clearly prioritized: myself first and foremost—then my purpose, my family, my friends, and my passions.

I am dedicated to the practice of being my best self, being more present, and achieving greater clarity on my purpose.

This new foundation has already led to the discovery of new goals and passions, such as transitioning into cybersecurity and engaging in brand and business building through several new projects.

Closing Reflection — Growth in the Reset

Reaching the end of this process isn't about having all the answers — it's about clarity. Losing a job can feel like the end of stability, but it can also mark the beginning of self-ownership.

That blank page you’re left with? It’s not emptiness. It’s potential.

Every setback, frustration, and doubt becomes raw material for growth. When you stop defining yourself by what’s gone, you finally see what’s been there all along — the ability to rebuild, redefine, and realign with what truly matters.

"Starting at zero isn’t losing everything. It’s finding yourself again."